the Shira Rose

A NYC Body Positive Fashion Blog

Relapses Happen. But I’m Not Going To Let Anorexia Kill Me

This is a post I never wanted to write: It’s a post about relapse.

I’ve spent the last few weeks feeling so ashamed that, after months of intensive treatment in California, I’ve relapsed — badly.

Some of you may have read Sam’s blog post of my experience attempting to receive continued treatment at home. In it, he shares some of the more harrowing details of what happened to me in treatment. It feels heartbreaking that I’m in this dangerous place again, especially when I came back to New York with so much hope for the future.

But I’m not giving up.eating disorder recovery

I spent weeks in a partial hospitalization program (PHP) that crushed my spirit. But (more…)

Quasi Recovery Vs. Full Eating Disorder Recovery

denim jacket

My downfall in my eating disorder recovery comes from thinking that I can just hold onto my eating disorder “a little bit.” I can still get better while somehow controlling my weight. I can get better and restrict just a little. I can refrain from certain food groups here and there.

Doesn’t that (more…)